Rules for Snuggling

The rules for snuggling are as follows: 1) For adult males, snuggling with eight-year-olds must be kept at a distance and no cameras from The National Enquirer are allowed. 2) Cold kneecaps are also expressly forbidden. Warm them with your hands first if necessary. My belly is not a kneecap warmer. And frankly, using me like that is a good way to give me a cold. 3) No chewing gum. It is too loud and echoey. Also, be sure to wash the Deep Heat ointment from your hands before you change your underwear or you may be in for the shock of your life.
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© 2007, 2012. Some text missing from this post. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.